I'm Baack

That was meant to be read as two syllables in case you're wondering.

I've returned from a 5-day retreat on Bowen Island, not a whole lot more rested, but feeling connected, affirmed and well-fed. Mon Dieux, I must have gained two pant sizes. It's so hard to stop eating food that is so beautiful, healthy and lovingly prepared.

While the meals, friendship and support were amazing, it's not exactly a "holiday" to go on one of these retreats, as an examination of the self in general, and of one's illness in particular, is the point. There were twelve participants this time, eight old friends and three new ones. It always amazes me how, given the time and space, people of differing backgrounds and experience can come together and engage in such thoughtful, open, and honest dialogue. And the food...did I mention the food?

The road to Rivendell

The view from my room toward Horseshoe Bay

Mother deer outside my window (bottom left)

The labyrinth where "Mary" sang sweetly to us

Since I have been back, it seems as though I have been very busy, though I am not sure doing what. I guess I've had a lot of appointments, visits, etc. I also took my second dose of Lomustine this week and am feeling a little barfy post-dosage. It shouldn't last too long, but it wiped me out today and I could literally not get myself out of bed. My wonderful mom came and made me lunch and dinner, rubbed my feet, and read to me until I fell asleep. Sleeping all day does tend to keep one awake at night though.

This Monday, as mentioned previously, I will have my long-awaited PET scan to see what's been going on in there since we were in Texas almost three months ago. "Stable" disease/reduction (or, Santa, how 'bout that overdue remission I've been asking for?) is what we're after. So, c'mon, Fatso, hurry up and swap those reindeer for a hybrid and show me what you've got.